having one of those “wait, people aren’t all robots?” sort of days.

My brain doesn’t know what to do with itself today. I’ve had not enough sleep and too much coffee, so all I want to do is talk but none of it makes much sense. The world feels distant, something to be examined from afar; then, upon examination, it all becomes too close and too enormous to even begin to comprehend.

Life is never structured; you plan out your day, assuming your actions and the actions of others will follow your scripted format. But no one, nothing, can ever be properly predicted. Everyone wakes up with an agenda to follow, a mood set, aspirations for the day. They all conflict and bounce off each other and by the end of the day some people accomplish more than they’d hope, others less… but a perfectly uninterrupted, unsurprised day has never existed. This is not a bad thing, but can be very difficult to grasp for such a ubiquitous quality of life.

dead sunflower

Big words, little meaning, all swimming feebly on the screen but seeming so sharply focused in my head.

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